C/A/T will be coming to an end in 2010. 2009 has been a disaster. Constantly and consistently.
There WILL be one more album in early Summer.
There WILL be one more US Tour in late July into August (with End: the DJ as the support act).
No, I’m not quitting music. I will be still be doing Captive Six as a more straight electro project and will slowly start working on a new vocal-based band likely in late 2010 or early 2011.
No, Crunch Pod isn’t going anywhere.
You can only get screwed over and ripped off so many times before it no longer becomes worth doing any more.
See you on the road next Summer and say goodbye.
I've had at least 4 instances this year where we were SEVERELY underpaid at the end of a gig despite having signed contracts and/or agreements with promoters and venues.
Let me give you the scenario so it's all out in the open.
C/A/T does not ask for thousands of dollars for a gig. In most cases I play shows at a LOSS. Especially if I decide to do something better than an iPod doing playback and me doing live vox.
Flights cost money. Hotels cost money. Taxis cost money.
I get the "word" of someone or even a signature on a piece of paper... but what does that mean? Apparently nothing.
"Shit happened, bro..." - can't tell you how many times that happened this year. Each time I heard that or something similar it meant at least $100 or more less at the end of the night. When we were praying and hoping to BREAK EVEN on the road or minimize the losses we were set to incur by accepting a booking.
I'll accept responsibility in some of the failures of 2009. I put faith in people and groups that I gave the benefit of the doubt that ended up screwing me over in the end and putting me in an even shittier position as far as live gigs. Lesson learned. But seriously... if I get a signed document from someone saying they're going to pay us "$xxx" what does that mean? That I have to take every deadbeat promoter to small claims court over a few hundred dollars EACH TIME? I mean, seriously?
I know enough other artists that are in other electronic scenes to know that this does happen but not NEARLY to the extreme is happens in "industrial / goth / noize / tbm/ jizzcore" or whatever.
My choices are:
1. Only play the Das Bunkers, Sadisco*s (somewhat R.I.P.), etc. of the "industrial scene" and do literally about 4 or 5 one-off gigs per year. This would mean I could play a gig for a crowd who would know I'm getting what we agreed to a few times a year.
2. Take a break and move on and start writing something for another scene and succeed or fail there and start from scratch.
I've never felt such a disconnect with the 'industrial scene' that I do at this moment.
I think I finally reached the breaking point on stage tonight - even before I knew we weren't going to go home with the money that was promised us...
Industrial music - I like you... you're really good and you have some really incredible bands and artists who work on music and art that resonant with your "genre"... but... my personal writings and you - well I think we're going to have to break up. It's just not working out. We can still be friends but I think this serious relationship between us is over.
It's probably been over for about 6 months but I just didn't want to admit it because you were such a big part of my life. I even tried to change who I was to try and "fit in" with you more but it just wasn't me. I finally realized this recently.
It's not you... it's me.
I realize I'm going to lose a lot of people with where I'm going to go musically now... but I think it's fitting this happens.
Only time will tell at this point.
I feel stronger than ever and yet scared and nervous at the same time.
So, naturally... this feels right.
Much love and thanks to everyone who has supported me over the years ... and I hope I don't lose too many of you over the next year.
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